picky

my son is a picky eater. not like, he does-not-like-peas-picky. it’s more like he does-not-like-anything-picky. and it’s not just a new thing either. it’s not a phase or something that will pass. as an infant he drank formula fine. as i began introducing solid foods to him, he just wouldn’t eat them. he would try some fruit but that was it. everything else (cereal, vegetables, etc) would cause him to gag. so i put off starting him on solid foods and we went back to just the bobby (bottle). then he was off formula and on regular milk. it was still very difficult to get him to eat anything. little things here and there but never a full meal. but his love of the bobby continued. he would eat apples. but not all apples. if they were too tart…nope. if they were too soft…not gonna eat it. they had to be just right and so. this was how it continued. and where i might have gone wrong. i look back and think that maybe if i had pushed the baby foods more and the bobby less then things would have been different. but then i think that it really wouldn’t have mattered. when we go to people’s houses i tell them not to worry about him eating. if he likes it he’ll eat it. if not, don’t worry. it’s the story of my life. he will make comments about a food/restaurant being gross and i will be quick to tell him that he has no real authority to base this decision on since he doesn’t eat anything. seriously, limited is not even the right word.

i tell people that he actually eats quite a lot of foods but they have to be JUST RIGHT. he loves macaroni & cheese but it has to be KRAFT, he likes frozen waffles but it has to eggos, he likes syrup but it has to be log cabin, he likes powerade (not gatorade) but it has to be red/fruit punch, he likes apples but (see above), he likes pizza but it has to be this kind of pizza with this crust with this topping which he’s gonna most like pull off anyway, he likes pasta but it has to be spaghetti and it has to be only certain marinara sauces, he likes bread but it has to have a certain taste & texture, he likes chicken but it has to be flavored a certain way, he likes ribs but if the sauce is not just how he likes it then no. if anything veers off from how he likes it then forget it. he’s not going to eat it no matter how hungry he is. he’s not going to try it no matter how much you cajole and threaten. i often offer him $50 to just take a bite of something. i know my money is safe because he would never ever ever never ever try it. i know this.

we eat out quite often too. and he will ask me what i want to eat and i will just say “you pick. you only will eat at a handful of places so just pick and then i will just get something there” but if i were to pick something where i really wanted to go then he wouldn’t eat (which has happened quite often). if it’s fast food then it’s burger king chicken nuggets. and that’s it. no mcdonalds, jack, wendys, etc. only burger king. so if there is no burger king then it’s not happening for fast food. well except kfc which has m&c (his staple). we go to a local chinese food restaurant and he orders plain noodles no veggies no meat. they know us there and they always know what he wants. the mrs. owner will say it with a question in her voice hoping to hear him choose something else. but in the past 7 years he hasn’t. i’m thinking it may never change.

someone once told me that there are people who are “texture eaters” and that the feel & texture in their mouth while they are eating is part of them being picky. and i know caine is like this. when he was little if i were feeding him cereal and i mixed it with fruit, he would balk at the change in texture. or if there were lumps or anything out of the normal or his “normal”.

a good friend of mine was a picky eater growing up. she liked what she liked and she would just eat those same things over and over. i was not a picky eater (except peas…gross) and didn’t really know any picky eaters so she was my only experience with it. but as the years have gone by she has really opened up her food list. i told her the other day that i was going to send him to live with her so that she can teach him to eat other foods. and i asked how do you do that? and she said “give him no other choices”…couldn’t it have been something easier? that makes total sense though. am i enabling him to continue down this uber-picky road? i’m the one that makes sure his foods are bought and stocked in the house. i’m the one that takes him to the places where they offer things he will eat. maybe if i stopped that then he would start eating. i wonder though…how hungry he’d have to be to actually eat a sandwhich or casserole. unfortunately i think he’d have to be pretty damn hungry.